my bitchy moments

HI IM BACK.(WHO CARES RIGHT)
yeah,with the not so good mood.had my b***hes days few weeks back.TOTALLY FELT like a professional WORLD CLASS b***h.NOPE.please do cross out all the negative words you wanna associate with what i've just said.i super felt like i had no LIFE NOW.and that my life just revolves around SCHOOL.i swear i NEVER had THIS FEELING b4.like the feeling you think about going to school tmr,fearing that you might not able to finish your schedule work,fearing of PEOPLE disturbs you with work.FEARING that youR ideas might NOT  be accepted by group members???

I SWEAR WASN'T me back then.i used to be so CHILLED out in life.so laid back.THINK NOTHING ABOUT SCHOOL.assumed school was just part of the days that need to go through in life.BUT NOW,THINGS CHANGED.i have no idea for betta or worst??I FELT SO TERRIbLY STRESS FOR DUNNO WHAT REASON.I SWEAR.I AM NOT ME.NOWADAES.

all the DEMONs have turned me into a SUPER BITCHY GIRL.AND I DUN WANNA AND DUN WISH TO BE THAT.OKAY LOOK,im just gonna be a nice,CRAZY next door girl.i mean the past me.NOWADAES w/o realising i've turned to TALK ABT PPL????LIKE SO NOT ME.I SWEAR I HATE IT. LOOK IM THE STRAIGHT FORWARD TYPE.yes my words are aharsh and hurtful at times but at least i convey my msg to the INTENDED person directly becos I DUN LIKE THEIR WAYS?oh that USED TO BE ME.BUT NOW,I CAN'T???i have to either keep quiet/like pretend not to know/PRETEND I LIKE(the worst feeling) EVEN IF i DISAGREE THINGS??

i wanna voice out but instead people want me to keep away or just KEEP MY MOUTH SHUT and instead make/divert me into engaging 'small private talk',LIKE TO KEEP SECRET?EH,tis is not primary school or even secondary school i swear!even when i'm that age,I DUN DO THAT???

now, i have to let out my anger in 'small private talk'.THAT'S WHY I FELT LIKE A BITCH.i mean like kinda GOSSIP in a rude way of saying.people dun influence me easily.its just the way i'm thinking now that rules me.COS I HAVE TO WORK WITH THEM(IN project)SO I  have no choice to stay 'FRENS' wif them and be kinda two face and can't afford to hurt them.LIKE MAMPOS.this kinda feeling sucks i swear!I HOPE BY THIS WEEKEND,IM able to wash off ALL THE IMPURITIES IN ME.

wish me LUCK!

hope to get away from all this STRESS symptoms.and be a GOOD, non-bitchy girl.YOU KNOW WHAT,SILENCE IS THE BEST NOWADAES(which is so not me oso)

XOXO.
'bitchy idiot'(hope i can erase this title by end of the week!!!)

embekkkkkkkkkk!

long time i've neve blog heh.sory had no tyme for it.like seriously.been running here and there.juggle between skool and work and piles of project works.

its PH finally.i wanted to see the korban this morning,but couldn't wake up so ya.ytd's eve of raya was like f***.i had project to do till like 9pm.like 9 im still in skool.neve do till that late b4.had to do it cos if i dun,i have to come today?like HALO.its holiday right??to tell you seriously i have no time to rest peacefully for the past few weeks.

i kinda regret working part time.yes for the sake of extra money,i had to work.actually when come to think of it,i dun really need it,actually i just wanted to 'get away' from home this month.if you know why.but after knowing all the projects that i have to do,time away from home is definately there.i had to have lotsa project meeting and discussions!plus the skooling hour sucks lately.then nearing weekend,i'm all plan for part time work!how sucky can that be.I REALLY WISH TO RUN AWAY FROM EVERYTHING.i swear i'm super tired thinking of projects and stuff!

i can only afford to chill last weekend for a drive wif cuzzins.mit the girls; aspa and shab.had a great time chatting non-stop.HAHA.apart from that i had no time to meet the rest of my frens,either their time is clash with mine or what.i dun even have time to meet nani.usually we tend to meet like 2-3 times a week!now....its difficult to even meet once a week.im sorry nani,its okay you have your bf to accompany your days.hehe

i have some photos taken like ages back.not really ages la..2 months back i guess?okay here it is.outing wif my poly mates.one of the girls bdae!FIZA.no not me.HAFIZAH HAMID. & nope they are not from my course.like duh.schoolmates.hope my blog is not wordy for you!SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILADHA!

P.S: i'm not going out today i guess.i need finish my report!& rest maybe?if there is time.SO MUCH TO DO SO LITTLE TIME.and to all my frens,bestfrens,best pals,best mates,aquaintance,IF I NEVE MEET YOU DOSEN'T MEAN I DUN LOVE YA.I STILL DO,I SERIOUSLY HAD NO TYME.IM SORRY.JUST GIVE ME A KOL IF YOU FEEL LIKE TALKING TO ME.IM ALWAYS THERE.(for calls only at this moment) +_0

eve of diwali!(mcm paham)

i feel like blogging today.so i did.shall just talk about the sucky week that ive been thru aite.i bet no one reads my post so i shall just might as well make it like my diary entry.HAHA.cos i was trying to have a paper pen diary kinda thing but it sucks.cos i hate writing,long tyme ago i last write except for lately writing skool notes.typing is way faster and i think nicer fonts.my handwritting sucks.i keep changing my handwritting as to dunno which one seems betta(all sucks actuali).

im having school right now,right at this moment as i am typing,am having lectures.it sucks.i began to master the multi-task of listening and typing(doing my personal stuff).i also do have the ability to choose what i wanna hear.sounds amazng right?haha!actuali its more of a family gene.my brother and me have the same ability unlike my sis.she's forever LISTENING.and that is super irritating.cos she wants to know every little thing we talk about.(not necessary most of the tyme)

niwaes,the point is,everyone in this class is super smangat listening to lectures whereby im here blogging.but the thing is,when the lecturer ask questions,they are speechless.I AM THE ONE ANSWERING.(mostly correctly)(round of applause for me pls).

no.im not smart according to them,im the most bimbotic idiot around the school of science.believe me,my course is full of craps(studious people,geeks)around with like books and suitcase walking,rushing for the next class kinda faces.i felt so much worst after my clan of people(mlayu rox) gone for attachments.i felt like a loner in school having to force and be like one of them BUT WHEN I DUN FEEL like being any part of them,which i always do,i will walk away,have my lunch one corNAR,call members,talk(mcm org tak civilise).in class,msn(wif members tebiats,namely nani rp,(sucks oso,i mean her school duh),farah at aussie den ketawe mcm sial sorg),google,online window shopping are my next bff.

i have the biggest lateset confession,i hate school.it sucks.the process of it sucks.the best part i always get the WRONG GROUP when it comes to projects.one group for design project is lepak and they only cling on hope to this one girl,and when i gave ideas,they kinda reject it,like as if im super stupid!?then there was one idiot member even called me stupid for that.WTF kan.i hate you.i swear i will remember what you've said the rest of my life and make sure you pay for what you've said.

as for the fyp group, i got one of the best(geeks) teamates for it.the positive side is we are working well,duh wif the geeks around,but,the negative side is they have become my PA.giving me morning calls to ensure that i wokeup for the meetings and stuff.even my mum is not as irritating as them.i swear.

I MADE THE WRONG DECISION of watching THE LAST EXORCISM.it wasn't scary at all!i swear.

i had bout 1and half hour of shopping time alone ytd while waiting my fren end work and b4 we could proceed for the movie.so i had good time looking stuff(art stuff) at spotlight which excites me,thinking bout changing my theme for the party,LOL.went daiso,looking at all the stuffs which make me dizzy and end up buying a packet of caramel corn,den went ahead to times and yes at last the book is there!the one ive been looking for.it wasn't there when i came a month ago.saw it,grab it.keching!(gaji bru masok babe)I THINK I LIKE THIS WORK.(part time)cos they give the pay quite efficiently.fast.unlike the pervious works,like on the 7th,last day of first week then we got.i love you work(money wise)! 

and the hilarious thing. the bus ride home was super funny when the bus jam brake and my fren was having a greaT TURN TWISTING around as if she was doing some kinda ballet steps.HAHA.super hilarious.i was laughing my head off when i saw that!my face was as red as babboon's butt.i hate bus drivers.

im super excited for tmr.hope today ends fast!eve of deepavali you know(step celebrate).no point actuali,had work 300mins later.HAHA.HAPPY DEEPAVALI to all indians and those who celebrate!!

ps:i wonder at times if you are my fren.when you need me you hang on me but if you dun,you just simply cast me aside.how could you?